Mr. Hankey, the Christmas Poo (song)

"Mr. Hankey, the Christmas Poo" was first featured in the episode, "Mr. Hankey, the Christmas Poo", sung by Kyle Broflovski. An extended version of the song was written for the introduction of the episode, "Mr. Hankey's Christmas Classics".

Background
This song is sung by Kyle Broflovski and by the town in "Mr. Hankey, the Christmas Poo". In "Mr. Hankey's Christmas Classics", it is sung by the Mailman and various children.

"Mr. Hankey, The Christmas Poo"
Mr. Hankey, the Christmas Poo he loves me and I love you Therefore, vicariously he loves you even if...

"Mr. Hankey's Christmas Classics"
We've all heard of Rudolph and his shiny nose And we all know Frosty whose made out of snow But all of those stories seem kind of... gay Cuz we all know who brightens up our holiday

Mr. Hankey the Christmas Poo Small and brown he comes from you Sit on the toilet here he comes Squeeze him between your festive buns

A present from down below Spreading joy with a "howdy ho" He's seen the love inside of you Cuz' he's a piece of poo

Sometimes he's nutty Sometimes he's corny He can be brown or greenish-brown (Mmm Mmm) But if you eat fiber on Christmas Eve he might come to your town.

Mr. Hankey the Christmas Poo He loves me I love you Therefore vicariously he loves you

Bradley: I can make a Mr Hankey too! (fart noise)

Cartman: Well Kyle where is he?

Kyle: He's comin'

Stan: C'mon dude push!

Kyle: I'm trying!

Cartman: Oh wait wait I can see his head!

Kyle: HERE HE COMES!! (fart noise)

Mr. Hankey: HOWDY HO! I'm Mr. Hankey the Christmas Poo Seasons greetings to all of you

Let's sing songs and dance and play Now before I melt away Here's a game I like to play Stick me in your mouth and try to say

Howdy ho ho yum yum yum Christmas time has come! Sometimes he's runny Sometimes he's firm

Sometimes he's practically water Sometime he hangs off the end of your ass and won't fall in the toilet Cuz he's just clinging to your sphincter

and he won't drop off and so you shake your ass around and try to get it to drop in the toilet and finally it does

Mr. Hankey the Christmas Poo When Christmas leaves he must leave too Flush him down but he's never gone His smell and his spirit lingers on.... Howdy ho!''