"Humbug" from The Stingiest Man in Town
"Humbug" is a song from The Stingiest Man in Town and its animated adaptation.
It is sung by Basil Rathbone and Johnny Desmond in the 1956 version and Walter Matthau and Dennis Day in the animated Rankin/Bass version.
Lyrics[]
Fred: Merry Christmas, Uncle Scrooge!
Scrooge: Humbug!
Fred: Oh, be merry, Uncle Scrooge!
Scrooge: Ha, ha, ha, ha!
What's so merry on Christmas Day?
The merry money you throw away?
The merry bills you have to pay?
When you say "Merry Christmas," I say bah!
Fred: Here's a present, Uncle Scrooge.
Scrooge: Humbug!
I think you are a fool to waste your cash.
What's the present you always buy?
A handkerchief or an awful tie.
Look at this tie and you'll know why
When I get Christmas presents, I say trash!
Fred: But everything at Christmas is so jolly and lively.
The Christmas trees and wreaths of holly...
Scrooge: Poison ivy!
Fred: The girls and boys who dream about St. Nicholas.
Scrooge: St. Nicholas?! Ridiculous!
Fred: Don't you like him, Uncle Scrooge?
Scrooge: Humbug!
Fred: Good old Nicholas.
Scrooge: That's a lot of slosh!
I abominate old St. Nick.
His reckless spending make me sick.
I think St. Nick's a lunatic!
When you say "old St. Nicholas," I say bosh!
[Speech]
Fred: Oh, don't be angry, uncle. Come dine with us tomorrow.
Scrooge: Christmas dinner? What a repugnant revolting institution.
Fred: Oh, don't you like a juicy Christmas turkey?
Scrooge: Detest it!
Fred: Plum pudding with a brandy sauce?
Scrooge: Can't digest it!
Fred: You'll get a mellow feeling for humanity.
Scrooge: Humanity... insanity!
Fred: You'll enjoy it, Uncle Scrooge.
Scrooge: Humbug!
It may be fun for you, but not for me.
I'm not merry on Christmas day.
I'm never happy, I'm never gay.
If you think I could feel that way,
Then you are just as stupid as can be!
If you think I'll be merry,
And chirp like a canary,
Then you are even dumber than a dumb bug!
When you say "Merry Christmas," I say nonsense!
Fiddlesticks! Poppycock! And just plain humbug!
Humbug! Humbug, humbug, humbug!