"The Banks of the Delaware River" is a Christmas-themed sketch from the Warner Bros. animated television series Histeria! It is the only Christmas-themed sketch in the series' run and was featured in the episode "The American Revolution - Part I", originally broadcast on Kids' WB! on September 17, 1998.

The sketch features a comedic telling of George Washington and his troops crossing the Delaware River, set to A Visit from St. Nicholas. Series regulars Father Time, Big Fat Baby, Loud Kiddington, World's Oldest Woman, and Miss Information also make cameo appearances in this sketch.


"It's 11:00 PM, December 24, 1776, and all is well!"

As the title suggests, the sketch opens on the banks of the Delaware River, where we find Father Time working as a Salvation Army Santa, accompanied by Loud Kiddington, as a town crier, declaring that it is 11:00 PM on December 24, 1776. At that point, George Washington is heard delivering rhyming narration in the style of A Visit from St. Nicholas as some of his American soldiers, seen sitting around a campfire, are fighting over a blanket. Washington himself arrives on skis and goes to relax inside his cabin headquarters, to the envy of his men. Washington states to the viewers that he is planning to strike a surprise attack on the Hessian Barracks in Trenton, New Jersey.

Washington and his men (and Big Fat Baby) crossing the Delaware.

However, since the American soldiers will have to cross the Delaware River to get there, Washington first has to go rent a boat. At the boat rental stand, the storekeeper, the World's Oldest Woman, tells Washington that he will need to pay a stack of hundred-dollar bills in order to rent her boats, and she will not take a check. After paying the World's Oldest Woman with a wheelbarrow full of money, Washington and his men make their way across the Delaware River. When dawn comes, though, they accidentally crash the boat into a rock in front of the shore.

Later, inside the Hessian Barracks, one of the Hessians (who briefly takes over the narration at this point) overhears noise outside and goes to the door to see what's going on. When he opens the door, he sees dozens of giant gift boxes on the building's front lawn and immediately wakes his fellow Hessians, believing they were just visited by Santa Claus. However, when the Hessians tear open the gift boxes, it turns out that the gift boxes were a disguise used by the Americans, who overtake the Hessians and win the battle of Trenton. The sketch ends with Washington and his men riding off with the captured enemy soldiers, with Washington declaring "Merry Christmas to everyone, and hot cocoa for all!"


The episode containing the sketch, along with the rest of the series, was made available in the Histeria!: The Complete Series manufacture-on-demand DVD set, released by Warner Archive on July 12, 2016.


Voice actor Character
Frank Welker Father Time
Bill Clinton
Luke Ruegger Big Fat Baby
Laraine Newman Miss Information
Tress MacNeille World's Oldest Woman
Cody Ruegger Loud Kiddington
Maurice LaMarche George Washington

Note: Fetch, Cho-Cho, and Lucky Bob appear, but do not have speaking parts.

External links

Warner Bros.
Warner Bros. Pictures Christmas in ConnecticutGremlinsLethal WeaponNational Lampoon's Christmas VacationBatman ReturnsJack FrostNational Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 2: Cousin Eddie's Island AdventureThe Polar ExpressKiss Kiss Bang BangThe Year Without a Santa ClausFred Claus
New Line Cinema ElfThe Nativity StoryFour ChristmasesA Very Harold & Kumar 3D ChristmasThe Conjuring 2Shazam!
Blue Ribbon Content A Christmas Story 2A Cinderella Story: Christmas Wish
Live-action television episodes
Friends and Joey "The One With Phoebe's Dad" • "The One Where Rachel Quits" • "The One With the Girl from Poughkeepsie" • "The One With the Inappropriate Sister" • "The One With the Routine" • "The One With the Holiday Armadillo" • "The One With the Creepy Holiday Card" • "The One With Christmas in Tulsa" • "Joey and the Plot Twist" • "Joey and the Christmas Party"
DC Comics "Season's Greedings" • "Home is Where the Hurt Is" • "Twas the Night Before Mxymas" • "Lexmas" • "Gemini" • "Year's End" • "Three Ghosts"
Other shows "A Semi-Merry Christmas" • "Mel, the Magi" • "Mel's Christmas Carol" • "'Tis the Season to Be Jealous" • "A Christmas Story" (Growing Pains) • "A Christmas Story" (Just the Ten of Us) • "Santa on the Lam" • "Miracle on Elm Street" • "The Christmas Show" • "Fa La La La Laagghh!" • "The Man Who Canceled Christmas" • "It Came Upon a Midnight Clear" • "Deck the Malls" • "Christmas Day-Ja Vu" • "A Country Christmas" • "How the Finch Stole Christmas" • "Meet the Cuban Parents" • "Christmas Punch" • "A Clear and Presentless Danger" • "George Is Being Elfish and Christ-Misses His Family" • "Santa's Secret Stuff" • "A Very Supernatural Christmas" • "The Bath Item Gift Hypothesis" • "Christmas" (The Middle) • "It's Beginning to Stink a Lot Like Christmas" • "The Maternal Congruence" • "Jolly Red Elf" • "The World Ain't Over 'Till It's Over" • "The Santa Simulation" • "Give Santa a Tail-Hole" • "Home for Christmas" • "Jingle Bell Glock"
Animated productions
Looney Tunes and related shows The Shanty Where Santy Claus LivesBedtime for SnifflesGift WrappedBugs Bunny's Looney Christmas Tales • "It's a Wonderful Tiny Toons Christmas Special" • "'Twas the Day Before Christmas" • "Jingle Boo" • "The Great Wakkorotti: The Holiday Concert" • "A Christmas Plotz" • "Little Drummer Warners" • "No Time for Christmas" • "A Pinky and the Brain Christmas" • "It Happened One Night Before Christmas" • "In Arms Way" • "The Twelve Days of Christmas" • Christmas Eve with Yakko, Wakko & Dot • "Noel" • "The Christmas Tree" • "The Banks of the Delaware River" • "Feather Christmas" • "Yule Be Sorry" • "Christmas in July" • Bah, Humduck! A Looney Tunes Christmas • "A Christmas Carol" • "Tis the Seasoning" • "Winter Blunderland" • "The Legend of Burrito Monday" • Bugs Bunny's 24-Carrot Holiday Special
DC Comics "Christmas With the Joker" • "Holiday Knights" • "Frozen Out" • "Comfort and Joy" • "Storybook Holiday" • "Invasion of the Secret Santas!" • "Second Christmas" • "The True Meaning of Christmas" • "Halloween v Christmas" • "Teen Titans Save Christmas" • "Beast Boy on a Shelf" • "Christmas Crusaders"
Hanna-Barbera co-productions "A Dickens of a Christmas" • A Scooby-Doo! Christmas • "Ho Ho Horrors" • Tom and Jerry: A Nutcracker TaleScooby-Doo! Haunted HolidaysTom and Jerry: Santa's Little Helpers • "The Plight Before Christmas" • "Scary Christmas" • "Scroogey Doo" • "It's a Wacky Life" • "Dashing Thru the Snow" • "Signed, Sealed and Wacky"
Other cartoons "Yuletide and Redtide" • A Cool Like That Christmas • "Santa Mask" • The Polar Express • "The Match Before Xmas" • A Miser Brothers' Christmas • "Da Grinchy Code / Duck" • "FROST / Undercover Claus" • "Fantastic Four Christmases / Red and White Collar" • Elf: Buddy's Musical Christmas • "Christmas in Oz" • "Top of the Naughty List" • "Mandora Saves Christmas"
Have Yourself a Looney Tunes ChristmasA Hip-Hopera ChristmasMerry Christmas: Animaniacs & Looney TunesThe Looney Tunes Kwazy ChristmasA Looney Tunes Sing-A-Long Christmas
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